Posts from — October 2002

Some interesting pieces of information!

Now, why would the news of two scientists shaking hands make it to the headlines of a national newspaper?!! Ordinarily, it wouldn’t much of a news. But this is not ordinary. These scientists shook hands with each other even though they were located 3000 miles apart!! Whoa!… long hands!!!… you might exclaim! But this was not a news to announce a medical breakthrough in lengthening limbs. Instead it was a news item announcing that these scientists were able to actually shake hands over the internet. Sounds incredible, doesn’t it?!! Its true! These people used the high bandwidth fibre-optic cables to send across small impulses at very high frequencies. These impulses re-created the sense of touch. You can read more about this breakthrough here. So now… if you are chatting with someone on the Net and get an urge to get touchy-feely… you know what to do! ;)

One commodity that’s quite abundant in the world is stupidity and daily we hear about someone or something that just adds to this ever-growing reservoir of stupidity. Take the case of this jobless burglar who stole about 10,000 Swiss Francs worth equipment and fled. His only mistake in this whole affair was that he left his CV behind at the scene of crime!! … complete with name and address!! How much more can you expect a person to be!! :-|

You must’ve heard about the funniest joke in the world… the one about the hunters who went to the woods for hunting. This was selected as the best and the funniest joke from among a collection of 40,000 jokes collected from all over the world. The study was carried out by the Laughlab created by Dr. Richard Wiseman (University of Hertfordshire) in association with the British Association for the Advancement of Science. Well, anyways… here is the joke that lost out to the first placed joke in the final round…
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”
“I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” replies Watson.
“And what do you deduce from that?”
Watson ponders for a minute.
“Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?”
Holmes is silent for a moment. “Watson, you idiot!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”

Well, here’s something interesting! … My friend Rochelle thinks I resemble a cat!! Now, when I asked her the reason for that she said it was because I appeared to be comfortable! … or basically very untroubled at all times! … *LOL* … I told her she looks like a deer! ;-)

One of my friends sent me the following in a mail today. Its a repeat, but a good read anyways!… (some knowledge of the programming language ‘C’ would help… but its not a must… you would understand it easily!)…

struct female_professionals
{
    double styles;
    short skirts;
    long time_to_understand_problems;
    float mind;
    void knowledge;
    char non_co-operative;
};

struct married_females
{
    double weight;
    short tempered;
    long gossip;
    float hopes;
    void word;
    char unstable;
};

struct engaged_females
{
    double time_on_phone;
    short attention_on_work;
    long boast;
    float on_cloud_nine;
    void understanding;
    char edgy;
};

struct newly_married_females
{
    double dinner_invitation;
    short time_at_work;
    long lunch_break;
    void bank_balance;
    char hen_pecked;
};

struct husband_wife_professionals
{
    double income;
    short tempered;
    long time_no_see_each_other;
    void love_life;
    char money_making;
};

struct beautiful_city_girl
{
    double boyfriends;
    short affairs;
    long stories;
    void greymatter;
    char flirt;
};

struct old_lady
{
    double chin ;
    short memory;
    long sighs ;
    void attention_from_men;
    char chatterbox;
};

*LOL*… females explained!!

Anyways… today is a rare blip on my social-radar! My friend is treating me and a few other friends to dinner. Its been a long time since I ate out… bcos the past couple of months have seen me working from 8 to 8 in the office! So… its a welcome change! :)

Ok… with this I take your leave for the moment!

cheers!

Mental inside!

I had an interesting day yesterday. Well… (getting defensive) it wasn’t all that interesting. But its my life that we’re talking about here! Anything remotely out of the ordinary can be construed as interesting.

Intel has a forum for software developers known as the Intel Developer’s Forum and they have these frequent conferences all over the world. This year, the Indian leg of these conferences was held at Mumbai. And, last week on Friday, my boss asked me to go and attend it. Fine, I said… after all its not everyday that I get a chance to go to such conferences where latest technologies and software techniques are showcased. As it happened I was the only person from our Mumbai office to attend the conference. The other four people from the company were from the Pune office. So, they took care of the registration and other formalities… (which means that they arranged for a free-pass for me!).

So, yesterday… dressed in formal clothes, I set off towards the venue which incidentally was The Taj Lands End at Bandra… the hotel formerly known as The Regent… (Prince has started a bad trend!). I waited at the bus-stop for a bus which could take me to my destination. But as it always happens with me… all kinds of buses came and went… but the one I required (no. 86) refused to turn up! Glancing at my watch, I saw that I was going to be late. So, I jumped into a cab and asked the driver to hurry along since I did not want to be late. The maniac behind the wheel needed no further prompting as tried to do a Michael Schumacher! I sat in the back seat with one hand clutching the seat and the other hand clutching the cell-phone… my eyes wide open in terror, as the cab whizzed through the morning traffic without any regard to human life or property! Almost in no time… I was at Bandstand standing outside the imposing hulk of The Taj Lands End.

Here… I waited because I did not have the pass which could let me through to the ballroom where the conference was to be held. Actually, I was one of the first few to turn up at the venue. I was told that since I did not have the pass, I could wait for my colleagues, who had my pass, to arrive from Pune… or I could pay up a thousand bucks and eneter the ballroom then and there. Being the freeloader that I am, I waited. The bus from Pune was supposed to arrive at around 9:00 AM. So, all I could do was the loiter around in the lobby… which wasn’t such a good option since the AC was at full blast and my teeth were actually beginning to chatter (this is normally not a cause for concern… but nowadays, these teeth have given me sleepless night… literally!!… so I had to be careful). The other option was to stand outside the main door… basking in the pleasantly warm morning sun. But even that option was spoiled by the large number smokers who were puffing away to glory… polluting the fresh air that was brought in by the cool sea breeze. So… I chose a chair in an obscure corner of the lobby which the central airconditioning had been kind enough to exempt from the stream of cold air it continuously spewed out. There I was… sitting in the corner… twiddling my thumbs… watching the stream of CEOs, CIOs, CTO, CFOs of various companies get off their chariots and dwaddle into the ballroom while barking orders into the hands-free kits of their mobile-phones. Occaisonally… a good looking face would breeze through the door like a whiff of fresh air! :-)

As the clock ticked by minutes turned to hour and there was still no sign of the bus from Pune. So I waited some more! Finally… at 11 o’clock… well after the Intel CTO had delivered his keynote speech (without me in the audience, of course!) the bus from Pune turned up. As the weary Puneites filed out of the bus, I desperately tried to locate my Pune colleagues. But… I could not find them. My spirits took a nose-dive as I turned to leave. But then, a pretty assistant saw my plight and informed me that there were supposed to be three buses scheduled to arrive from Pune. Once again, my hopes soared as I continued to wait for those elusive colleagues. Then at 11:30 AM… the remaining two buses arrived and with them… my free pass!! ;-)

After I handed over my pass… I was given a bag which contained a variety of brochures from Intel and the sponsors like Microsoft and TCS. The bag also contained an Intel T-shirt, a pen with a string to put it around the neck, a writing pad, etc. With this bag of goodies (??!), I made my way into the ballroom which was already full while the CTO of TCS was in the midst of an inspired (and perhap… for some.. inspiring!) speech. The next speech was by a Maharashtrian guy, Abhijit Talwalkar, who is a VP in Intel. This guy had a stronger American accent than even the couple of other American speakers who addressed the conference!!

Well, after this speech… we were treated to sumptuous lunch followed by some lip-smacking desserts. After lunch I roamed about in the lobby visiting the various stall put up by companies like Intel, Microsoft, TCS, RedHat, etc. At each stall… I collected some freebie or the other and at the end of my visit to the stalls… I had both my hand full of brochures, and goodies like… mouse pads, pens, badges, promotional offers… and even a stopwatch-cum-FM-radio!! ;-) … as I said… I’m quite a freeloader!

The presentation sessions after lunch were boring… much like this blog which is now threatening to grow out of proportion (it has already gone past the limits of dullness). Anyways… so the point is that the afternoon session was so boring that I fell asleep right under the nose of a video camera which was capturing the action (I guess my sleepy head, on camera, nodding slowly in my sleep would be a better feedback than the lengthy form that they made us fill out!). Finally… at 5:00 PM… after a barrage of presentations and a comparatively productive session in one of the Technology Labs, I decided to return home!

Back home… I found my mom making chivda for Diwali. So, I helped her prepare the chivda with an ulterior motive of popping some in the mouth as it was being made!! In fact, I ate so much of it that I did not have any dinner yesterday evening! *LOL*

With some time on my hands and I decided to watch Shrek, since I had not been able to do so even though I had bought the VCD last weekend. Shrek came heavily recommended and I was afraid that it might not live upto the hype as is the case with so many movies I have been recommended. But no sirree, Bob!!… it was an amazing movie with a simple storyline and I had a smile on my lips from start to the end (something that no movie has managed to do in the recent past!). In short… it lived upto its rating and recommendations!… and how!!

Now then… if I continue rambling like this… I’m sure to lose readership… which is something that would never do!! So… I take your leave for the day!!

cheers!

Don’t worry… be happy!

Here’s a snippet from a song that helps me drive away my blues! In fact, I just got a mail with an attachment which had a Flash animation with this song being sung by a Smiley.

Great song by Bobby McFerrin and great performance by Robin Williams in the video!!

cheers!

Shrek-mania

I seriously think that there is someone out there playing games with me. Out there, meaning really out there… *points to the sky*… !!! And they’ve chosen something as innocent as an animated movie called Shrek as the plaything!!

Consider this…
Over the last month, I’ve searched high and low for a VCD of Shrek. As I’ve already mentioned in some of my previous blogs, I could not find a copy of Shrek in any of the stores that I visited. This includes the high-profile Planet M stores, a couple of video-shops near my home, a couple more not-so-near my home and even online at Fabmart. At all these places I was, very courteously, told that no copies of the said VCD were in stock. I dunno why, but everytime I got a negative response at any shop, I became more obsessed with trying to hunt down a VCD for myself. Suku even offered to lend me her copy. That was extremely sweet of her!! Thanks a bunch for that offer, Suku!! :)
Okay… so the bottomline is that I was getting desperate (yeah! I know it sounds foolish!… and IT IS!!!)

So, this weekend, when I had been to Crossroads (for those who don’t know… it’s a shopping mall in Mumbai… and not the Britney Spears movie!!)… I just casually sauntered into Groove, the music shop. And there it was!! Displayed in all its glory… the VCD of Shrek! My eyes lit up and I grabbed it… before someone whisked it away from right under my nose!!

After I came home, feeling pleased with myself for getting the sought-after disc, I logged on to the Net to check up my mails. And what should I find there?!!!… A mail reminder from Fabmart informing me with great joy that they were, at long last and after much efforts, able to procure the VCD for me and had promptly shipped it to me!!

Its true what they say in Hindi… Bhagwan deta hai to chhappar phad ke deta hai. Translated, it means, when God gives he gives by tearing the roof. Ummm… I think I messed up the translation… but what the heck!… two days back I was Shrek-less. Today, I’m over-Shreked!!

I think I’ve shrieked enough about Shrek

Other news is that I have managed to make one more dent in my Feed-the-Greed list I had blogged about a couple of weeks earlier. As I have already mentioned, I had been to Crossroads on Saturday. The main motive behind going there was to buy myself a watch. So, veni… vidi… compravo!! (that… I think, means I came, I saw, I bought!… though don’t quote me on that!!) ;)

I bought a Swatch Irony! Its a chronograph with a dial of polished steel and a strap of dull polished metal. It looks a bit flashy… but what the heck!! ;)

Well, due to the Diwali promotion offers, I got two D’signer brand watches for free!… alongwith the Swatch!!… so I got three watches at the price of one! ;)

All throughout the weekend I was either shopping or doing some Diwali cleaning at home. In the time I managed to squeeze in between these activities, I started reading Lord of the Rings - Fellowship of the Ring. I’m just a 100 pages into the book and I’m already in love with it! The flowing narrative sucks you in and makes you a co-conspirator in the adventures of Frodo, Sam and company! Its wonderful… and I just can’t wait to sink my fangs deeper into this amazing adventure!! ;)

Yesterday, I wanted to go and see The Road to Perdition with my friends. But as luck would have it, it was being screened only a three theatres in Mumbai and two of those were less-than-decent. And even the decent enough theatre was screening it at an inconvenient time. So, we had to drop that plan and instead we went and saw xXx (Triple X)!! I intend to write a full-length review for that movie… but in brief (in brief… not in briefs!) I can only say that if you want to go and see xXx… heed this advice…
1> Suspend your disbelief
2> Unscrew your head and keep it in your lap
3> Stock up the pop-corn and cola
4> Enjoy the action!!

Okay folks… I guess before I ramble any further… I’ll take your leave for the moment. But before I leave… here’s a verse from LOTR-FOTR that I liked…

cheers!

P.S.: Tomorrow… I would be spending the day at The Taj Lands End (formerly The Regent), as I would be attending the Intel Developer Forum conference there. The keynote speakers for the event would include the CTO of Intel. So, I’ve got to be on my best behaviour with formal clothes and sober demeanour… especially since I would be representing my organization! …*LOL* … such responsibility!! ;)

Jo kuch kahoonga ’search’ kahoonga… ’search’ ke sivay kuch nahi kahoonga!

Just checked out the results of tracking the visits on this page. Last week, I had done something similar and posted the results on my blog. Check out the latest four search queries on Yahoo and Google that have resulted in hits on this page…

26 Oct, Sat, 20:00:05 Yahoo: “shop blogs”
28 Oct, Mon, 05:06:44 Google: andhra sexy girls
28 Oct, Mon, 06:32:27 Google: sexy clothes for arabic girls
28 Oct, Mon, 07:13:43 Yahoo: Nokia 6510 Infra red problem

Now… what can I say?!!! *LMAO*
Let me assure you that I have no knowledge of any “sexy andhra girls” nor do I buy or sell “sexy clothes for arabic girls”!!! ;-)

Search engines can be unintentionally hilarious!!

cheers!